Monday, August 22, 2005
Puzzled by the mountains, Tricked by the sea...
Man, I have no idea what got into the water around here... but there are a lot of people saying a lot of ridiculous things. This is more than just "eating crow," which I have to do a lot of. This is unadulterated ignorance.
There is something beautiful about the moment that someone says something so profoundly stupid that you turn to whoever else heard it and share that look; the look that says "Did I just hear what I thought I heard?" This sort of thing is even better when the person who said it wholeheartedly believes it. Yes, unfettered disregard for basic human intelligence can be a beautiful thing.
Let me warm up with an example from Hollywood. Remember the movie "A Christmas Story?" You know, Red Ryder BB Gun and all that? Well, one of the child actors in the movie (I won't say who because I do not 100% remember) was on a VH-1 special the other day about child stars gone bad. It seems that this particular actor turned to porn in his 20's. He was greasy, overweight, and... well, less than grounded in reality. Other than doing porn, he said this awesome quote to give us proof, "I did what no other actor has ever done before... I was a mainstream actor that crossed over to adult movies..."
What? Okay, child actor X is a star for a brief moment at 10... cut to that same lard-o at 25, and he is no longer "mainstream." You gotta work to be mainstream. And being an extra "elf" in the movie Elf does not count as "mainstream actor" work.
So do you get the sort of ignorance I am talking about? That one was a little lighthearted... well here in Omaha we have decided to challenge for the world title in brain failure. Two things were said in the local news lately that just floor me. What is more boggling to me is why the news printed/played these quotes and didn't take the sources to task.
The first revolves around the plans for Omaha to annex a near-by suburb. The people of Elkhorn are desperately fighting the annexation. They have launched a campaign against the inevitable by yelling and waving signs... its been a lot of fun. They even tried to do a little forced annexation themselves to bring their population above mark where Omaha cannot force annexation. That failed (because it was ill conceived to start with), and the courts are siding with Omaha. Here's the punchline... of all of the angry hillbillies that they have paraded about during this argument, one old lady stood out especially ignorant.... she said that the annexation of Elkhorn by Omaha was like "Hitler invading Poland."
What? So Omaha expanding it's tax base and watering down/improving (debatable still) your municipal services is like a madman marching infantry and driving tanks into a neighboring country, only to murder thousands and send thousands more off to concentrations camps. These concentration camps, by the way, rank in the top 3 atrocities ever performed on this Earth. So annexing Omaha is like that, huh?
The other fantastic quote was just this weekend. As you know, this Cindy Sheehan has received a ton of press world wide. Her vigil in the President's property is seen as foolish, heroic, and Moby Dick-esque. Politics of her point aside, there is almost always room for extremists to come out in flocks and say stupid things. Here in Omaha they had a vigil of solidarity. The people who turned out looked like the typical Omaha vigil crew... ex-hippies, wanna-be hippies, and college kids. If there was a vigil for marijuana legalization, it would be the same crew.
Anyway, one lady was interviewed that took the cake. She was a bit bedraggled, and had something going on with her eyes (they sort of darted about excitedly). She spoke with an uncalled for urgency as she proclaimed to the microphone, "What (Cindy Sheehan) is doing is important. She is like Rosa Parks. She is going to start a movement in this country the likes of which we have never seen."
If ever you needed proof that white, middle-America has failed to understand the plight of African-Americans, here it is. Sheehan is like Rosa Parks? Have they made her and people like her a second class citizen? Is she being denied basic human rights? Is she hated because she was born with a particular skin color? Is she being denied a fair chance at success in life? Is she made to feel like she belongs to a different species? Do people look at her and immediately think 'crime,' 'drugs,' 'sexual promiscuity'? I could go on, but I will stop.
No wonder surveys show that so many Americans believe in ghost, UFOs, and other supernatural nonsense. Not to mention the popularity of Nascar, poker, and competitive eating.
Horns up.
There is something beautiful about the moment that someone says something so profoundly stupid that you turn to whoever else heard it and share that look; the look that says "Did I just hear what I thought I heard?" This sort of thing is even better when the person who said it wholeheartedly believes it. Yes, unfettered disregard for basic human intelligence can be a beautiful thing.
Let me warm up with an example from Hollywood. Remember the movie "A Christmas Story?" You know, Red Ryder BB Gun and all that? Well, one of the child actors in the movie (I won't say who because I do not 100% remember) was on a VH-1 special the other day about child stars gone bad. It seems that this particular actor turned to porn in his 20's. He was greasy, overweight, and... well, less than grounded in reality. Other than doing porn, he said this awesome quote to give us proof, "I did what no other actor has ever done before... I was a mainstream actor that crossed over to adult movies..."
What? Okay, child actor X is a star for a brief moment at 10... cut to that same lard-o at 25, and he is no longer "mainstream." You gotta work to be mainstream. And being an extra "elf" in the movie Elf does not count as "mainstream actor" work.
So do you get the sort of ignorance I am talking about? That one was a little lighthearted... well here in Omaha we have decided to challenge for the world title in brain failure. Two things were said in the local news lately that just floor me. What is more boggling to me is why the news printed/played these quotes and didn't take the sources to task.
The first revolves around the plans for Omaha to annex a near-by suburb. The people of Elkhorn are desperately fighting the annexation. They have launched a campaign against the inevitable by yelling and waving signs... its been a lot of fun. They even tried to do a little forced annexation themselves to bring their population above mark where Omaha cannot force annexation. That failed (because it was ill conceived to start with), and the courts are siding with Omaha. Here's the punchline... of all of the angry hillbillies that they have paraded about during this argument, one old lady stood out especially ignorant.... she said that the annexation of Elkhorn by Omaha was like "Hitler invading Poland."
What? So Omaha expanding it's tax base and watering down/improving (debatable still) your municipal services is like a madman marching infantry and driving tanks into a neighboring country, only to murder thousands and send thousands more off to concentrations camps. These concentration camps, by the way, rank in the top 3 atrocities ever performed on this Earth. So annexing Omaha is like that, huh?
The other fantastic quote was just this weekend. As you know, this Cindy Sheehan has received a ton of press world wide. Her vigil in the President's property is seen as foolish, heroic, and Moby Dick-esque. Politics of her point aside, there is almost always room for extremists to come out in flocks and say stupid things. Here in Omaha they had a vigil of solidarity. The people who turned out looked like the typical Omaha vigil crew... ex-hippies, wanna-be hippies, and college kids. If there was a vigil for marijuana legalization, it would be the same crew.
Anyway, one lady was interviewed that took the cake. She was a bit bedraggled, and had something going on with her eyes (they sort of darted about excitedly). She spoke with an uncalled for urgency as she proclaimed to the microphone, "What (Cindy Sheehan) is doing is important. She is like Rosa Parks. She is going to start a movement in this country the likes of which we have never seen."
If ever you needed proof that white, middle-America has failed to understand the plight of African-Americans, here it is. Sheehan is like Rosa Parks? Have they made her and people like her a second class citizen? Is she being denied basic human rights? Is she hated because she was born with a particular skin color? Is she being denied a fair chance at success in life? Is she made to feel like she belongs to a different species? Do people look at her and immediately think 'crime,' 'drugs,' 'sexual promiscuity'? I could go on, but I will stop.
No wonder surveys show that so many Americans believe in ghost, UFOs, and other supernatural nonsense. Not to mention the popularity of Nascar, poker, and competitive eating.
Horns up.
Friday, August 19, 2005
Squaking like a big monkey-bird...
こんにちは。お元気ですか。
How about a blog entry about what is really going on in my life for once? : )
School has started once again for me! Yay! My second year of pharmacy school, and the classes are going to be great. I was so looking forward to pharmacology... only one of my teachers looks to be nutty, and he is a guy that has a long tradition of making students say "what the...?!" (Parenterals class for those of you classmates that peek at my blog).
My summer went by both long and fast. It seemed to rocket through July and August. I worked a ton in June and August, yet July was the month that went by fastest, although I had the most free time. As some of you may know, other than working, I spent my time this summer attending to my wife's grandmother. She became very sick this summer and was in the hospital. One night we almost lost her, and to be honest, had Sandy and I not been in the room, we would have lost her. But she is pulling it together and is recovering in the nursing home. We are all hoping she will get to go home in the future.
My life right now is pretty stable. Great, now I have tempted God... But seriously, things are pretty good! Sounds weird coming out of my mouth, doesn't it? Rich and Layla had their baby, and he is healthy. Sandy is over her sickness. Grandma is getting better. School has started. My work schedule is slowly decreasing to where I want it. I cleared some massive weights off of my mind and heart this summer with a couple people. My brother's nursing class starts next week, and we got his computer running. My Japanese studies are coming along. My pen pals are healthy, happy, and write often. Oh, and I found a used copy of "Ziggy Stardust and the Spiders From Mars" concert CD for only $13!!! Things are really pretty good!
Check with me in 2 months though...
Horns up!
How about a blog entry about what is really going on in my life for once? : )
School has started once again for me! Yay! My second year of pharmacy school, and the classes are going to be great. I was so looking forward to pharmacology... only one of my teachers looks to be nutty, and he is a guy that has a long tradition of making students say "what the...?!" (Parenterals class for those of you classmates that peek at my blog).
My summer went by both long and fast. It seemed to rocket through July and August. I worked a ton in June and August, yet July was the month that went by fastest, although I had the most free time. As some of you may know, other than working, I spent my time this summer attending to my wife's grandmother. She became very sick this summer and was in the hospital. One night we almost lost her, and to be honest, had Sandy and I not been in the room, we would have lost her. But she is pulling it together and is recovering in the nursing home. We are all hoping she will get to go home in the future.
My life right now is pretty stable. Great, now I have tempted God... But seriously, things are pretty good! Sounds weird coming out of my mouth, doesn't it? Rich and Layla had their baby, and he is healthy. Sandy is over her sickness. Grandma is getting better. School has started. My work schedule is slowly decreasing to where I want it. I cleared some massive weights off of my mind and heart this summer with a couple people. My brother's nursing class starts next week, and we got his computer running. My Japanese studies are coming along. My pen pals are healthy, happy, and write often. Oh, and I found a used copy of "Ziggy Stardust and the Spiders From Mars" concert CD for only $13!!! Things are really pretty good!
Check with me in 2 months though...
Horns up!
Friday, August 12, 2005
"Ask your sister if I can borrow her boom box."
For long time Bubblegoose (i.e. pre-blog) fans, Urban Lenny is no stranger. In many ways, his involvement with the BGN (Bubblegoose News, an email distributed newsletter/magazine) was integral to me being able to blog today. His inspiration for mixing editorial with introspection, and flavoring it all with humor is greatly appreciated. I don’t get to sit down and chat with Urban Lenny enough, and in a lot of ways my life is at its most “right” when I am in better communication with him.
Earlier this summer, Urban Lenny and I sat down for a long day together, and agreed to allow himself to be drilled with interview questions for use on this blog. So, over the next few months I am going to publish a few excerpts from that interview, I hope you all get a kick out of something in it each time.
Mao: Let’s just jump right in, I was surprised hear you like hip hop. Care to comment?
Urban Lenny: It shouldn’t surprise you… I mean, I realize that I am usually seen as a bit of a rocker but… man, I love music. There is this huge out-lash in certain circles against rap. It is founded in racism, I am sure of it. America is hiding this latent racism that is pretty scary. The back lash is also due to the way certain rappers are packaged as thugs. But hip hop is at once the new punk and the new Motown. There is something infectious in the beat that speaks to the soul, and yet there is so much true creativity in the lyrics… the rhymes…
M: So is it a legitimate art form?
UL: Definitely. And just to finish a random thought I had, hip hop isn’t necessarily a “black” thing. A lot of great hip hop elements have been co-opted into white musicians’ music. It’s more than music too, it’s a style. An attitude, fashion sense, and so on. I have some Japanese hip hop that is surprisingly good. It isn’t about shooting and bitches either. The core of hip hop is soul after all, and let’s face it… there aren’t a lot of soulful whites…
M: (laughs) What’s that?
UL: You know… a lot of white folks don’t have any soul. Fakin’ the funk, you know? Bustin’ out the rhyming dictionaries, working two months on the lyrics of a three minute rap. The real cats are like Shakespeare, inventing phraseology. The pretenders are all about rhyming every word, regardless how weak the lyric is. “word to your moms, I came to drop bombs, I got more rhymes than the Bible’s got psalms,” how whack is that?
M: (laughs) I had better steer this back to music before things get controversial. So what do you like… who do you like… in hip hop?
UL: Well, I like two sides of it. I like the creativity put into the beats. A lot of that was stolen by the techno culture. Especially the drum and bass community. Roni Size, Bjork, and Portishead all used it well. Anyway, I love dudes like Kool Keith, Danger Mouse, and DJ Shadow that can weave a killer, off kilter beat. But I also love a guy that can really “spit hot fire” like Dylan on Chapelle Show would say. It’s what rappin’ is all about, even back to the dance hall reggae days. The selector puts on a groove and the MC just rat-a-tat-tats over it. Greatest rap song ever; “Paid in Full.” The best at this sort of hip hop are, in my opinion, surprisingly unpopular. Everyone remembers Eminem, MC Hammer, and so on. The ones that are better at marketing than rhyming and producing. To me, Nelly is the new version of “Wacky D and Sunshine” (from CB4). The real warriors are De La Soul, Mos Def, Nas, the Roots, Q Tip, Wyclef, MF Doom, and so on.
M: De La!
UL: I knew you’d dig that. They sort of mix both sides of hip hop that I like. I sort of came into rap during the party rap phase. It really was about the rhymes then. Lame rhymes, like “Nightmare on my Street.” Then came NWA and Public enemy… wow. Run DMC was awesome, but they were creating a format on the fly. Not all of their stuff is gold. NWA and PE took the ball and ran with it in a great new direction. Now we’ve come too far and we have G Unit. Anyway, I like music. I will listen to anything, literally, until I decide I don’t like it. It just so happens that I dislike almost all country that I hear. It truly is soulless white people trying to play pop blues. It sucks. I mean, Big and Rich?! Come on.
M: I saw bits of the CMA Festival on CBS. They showed Big and Rich playing acoustic at a Children’s Hospital. They were singing “Save a horse, ride a cowboy” and having the kids sing the “cowboy” part. That seemed so wrong…
UL: (laughs) That is insane? I mean, that whole song is sexual innuendo isn’t it? Maybe we can hear 2 Live Crew on Radio Disney. Wow. I guess that Sir Mix A Lot is doing all sorts of versions of “Baby’s Got Back” on TV commercials and kids shows. Nothing like two hillbillies teaching 8 year olds about the birds and bees. But not to just bash on country, let’s try to be equal opportunity. I hate modern rock too. You can dress pop music up all you want, but when you try to make it something it isn’t, it will suck every time. I love a good pop song. It wouldn’t sell so many records if it wasn’t full of hooks. But don’t tell me that Jason Mraz is some sort of urban Lennon or (Bob) Dylan. Give me Gwen (Stefani) or Kelly (Clarkson) over Avril (Lavinge) and Allison (Morrisette) any day.
M: So Urban Lenny likes Kelly Clarkson too?
UL: Well, she is cute, and sings a good song. I should say, she has clever writers handing her good pop songs. If I am going to hear pop, I want to hear it from someone who has no delusions of being anything more than temporal. Jewel sucks, Smashmouth sucks.
M: I am more surprised to hear you go on so positively about pop music than I was to hear you were into hip hop…
UL: Oh, I am a musical softie from way back. (laughs) I mean, I am a sucker for it. I love George Michael, for instance. Having old INXS and Genesis alongside my indie stuff seems pretty lame, but I love a good song. Even the Cure is soft, man, but I dig it. Its like, “hey, ask your sister if I can borrow her boombox.”
M: Do you think the music industry is in trouble?
UL: Sort of… no… well, what a hard question. I think people will always steal music if they can. I dream of the day that there is an iPod for movies, but no one will rush to make a small, compact format for movie data storage now that we have seen what peer-to-peer has done to music. But the industry was dying on its own, there is so little good music being supported. There is so much crap. And when the major labels get into bed with Target and Wal-Mart to push crap on us for $15 to $20 a shot, eventually there will be a lull. Like Hollywood is having. There is so much cookie cutter rap, metal, and “alternative” (motions quotation marks with his hands). But the independent circuit is doing fine. In movies and music. I don’t mean fake independent like Good Charlotte, Killers, and Green Day. I mean true, off label gems. As much as I hate to say it, look at Bright Eyes and the success Connor (Oberst) has found). I prefer Polyphonic Spree and New Pornographers to anything else on the market today, to be honest. And what was that lame fad of rap-rock-emo-goth? “Bring me back to life?” “I’m broken” Staind. Lincoln Park. Limp Bizkits (sic?). Horrible moments on rock history. As horrible as Creed and Puddle of Mudd. I fear the VH-1 “I love the 00’s” specials. Just like I am ashamed I ever got mixed up in that grunge scene…
M: Let’s save that for another time. So to wrap up this long and boring rant on music, give us five recommendations for current music.
UL: Hmm. You got me into this one… Skindred. If you like metal, get Skindred. It is a little weak, a little pop, but the mix of reggae and metal would have to be. Reggae is pop, it always caters to the crowd. It’s about having a party, man. And beside, reggae is the foundation for all good music… punk, hip hop… So Skindred rocks. Mclusky broke up, but they are… were… the new Pixies. They sort of have a great noise sound that is wholly their own. New Pornographers are the perfect band, so you can’t go wrong there. Garage pop, you know? I would love to say Queens of the Stone Age, your guys, but the new album was trash.
M: I agree, it sucked.
UL: Flaming Lips have a new one coming out. They are always good. The Lips and Beck both impress every time. Did I give you five yet? Gorillaz is very good, System of a Down is… interesting. Its easier to tell you what I hate. Stay away from Jack Johnson, Foo Fighters, Nine Inch Nails, Jason Mraz, Green Day, and John Mayer. If you want to throw away $20 on something self important and awfully uncreative, go see an Oliver Stone film twice.
M: Favorite song in the last few years?
UL: Easy. Tribute by Tenacious D.
Horns up!
Monday, August 08, 2005
Fighting so grim, so true, so real...
I hate to start out what will be a post about a heavy topic with this new, but the news is so good I need to share it. My friend Rich and his wife Layla have delivered their first child! It is a baby boy, 19 inches long, and 5 pounds 13 ounces. His name is Andrew Ronald Wood. I am so happy for them!!! Mother and baby are doing fine (or so I hear), and I can't wait to see pictures!
Now on to the show.
This weekend was the seventh anniversary for my wife and me. It was (unfortunately) also the grim anniversary of the tragedy in Hiroshima. The event was so horrible, so stark, that the name Hiroshima seems to only conjure up one image... destruction.
60 years ago, the United States made the hard decision to use atomic weapons. They dropped the first atomic bomb ever used in warfare on a city in Japan named Hiroshima. August 6, 1945 was the day. And the effect it has had on the world is still felt today.
In the USA, whenever the bomb is discussed, it is most often followed with the phrase "... which ended World War 2." The justification was that if we could show our superiority through such a powerful weapon, that the Japanese would be forced to surrender. Two bombs later (a second was dropped on Nagasaki), and the US got its wish. To this day, there is a monster lurking in the soul of every American, as we realize how horrible the act was, and those of us who are patriots still feel the need to justify and qualify all statements regarding our assault on Japan.
I myself find it chilling to think about, and I am very ashamed of my country. I have no idea what alternative we had, but the murder of so many innocent people seems so vulgar. The decision to use the bomb, and the deployment of it on such a metropolitan area does nothing but hold a mirror to what is wrong with militarism. Over 100,000 people died, for no other reason than for inhabiting the land in which they were born. A soldier dies in war, and it is tragic... but to me that seems logical. Grandmothers, children, and fisherman dying in war does not seem logical. The dropping of the bomb seemed like something out of the book of Caesar or Atilla... make examples, hang 'em high, nail them to a cross for all to see... Show them our might makes right, and they may as well succumb to it.
In a testament to humanism of the highest order, Hiroshima today is a thriving city, completely rebuilt and strong in its convictions. It is a city full of people proud to be from Japan. Hiroshima is also the home of many pacifists and forward thinkers. And during the solemn services of remembrance, there was a quiet dignity and pride in the current inhabitants of Japan who stood and said "this is our home, we cannot be be driven from it, even in the face of ultimate horror."
I am glad that there is little ill will between Japan and the US. I am happy that I am able to learn their culture and language. I am glad that I can sit here and type while I drink my umeshu (which I am doing). I am glad I have made friends who brighten my life. And I am glad that I can dream of visiting Japan someday.
And when I do, perhaps I will travel to Hiroshima, and visit the park that stands in honor of the tragedy of August 6th, 1945. I will see the horrible artifacts that remain; I will see the mangled children's tricycle, and the watch that eternally stopped at 8:15 AM. I will see these things, and I will probably cry.
I hope that the USA starts to move away from the muscle approach, and heads in a more humanistic direction. I hope that in the future, we do not see mass slaughter as the only end to conflict. Our current war exposes our own darkness; we hate the terrorists who attack innocent people due to an ideology, only to have come to where are by the same means. The end of God's labors is not to see America proud and strong. America is not the goal of God or evolution. America is just another civilization that hopes it will be the first to last forever.
I hope America changes. I hope that wars become fewer, and I hope that my children can live in a world where Americans are not seen as monsters, and instead appreciated for the diverse and interesting culture we are. I hope that my friendships with Japanese people are not threatened by the image my country gives its citizens. And most of all I hope that we (as a planet) never use nuclear weapons again.
Horns up.
Now on to the show.
This weekend was the seventh anniversary for my wife and me. It was (unfortunately) also the grim anniversary of the tragedy in Hiroshima. The event was so horrible, so stark, that the name Hiroshima seems to only conjure up one image... destruction.
60 years ago, the United States made the hard decision to use atomic weapons. They dropped the first atomic bomb ever used in warfare on a city in Japan named Hiroshima. August 6, 1945 was the day. And the effect it has had on the world is still felt today.
In the USA, whenever the bomb is discussed, it is most often followed with the phrase "... which ended World War 2." The justification was that if we could show our superiority through such a powerful weapon, that the Japanese would be forced to surrender. Two bombs later (a second was dropped on Nagasaki), and the US got its wish. To this day, there is a monster lurking in the soul of every American, as we realize how horrible the act was, and those of us who are patriots still feel the need to justify and qualify all statements regarding our assault on Japan.
I myself find it chilling to think about, and I am very ashamed of my country. I have no idea what alternative we had, but the murder of so many innocent people seems so vulgar. The decision to use the bomb, and the deployment of it on such a metropolitan area does nothing but hold a mirror to what is wrong with militarism. Over 100,000 people died, for no other reason than for inhabiting the land in which they were born. A soldier dies in war, and it is tragic... but to me that seems logical. Grandmothers, children, and fisherman dying in war does not seem logical. The dropping of the bomb seemed like something out of the book of Caesar or Atilla... make examples, hang 'em high, nail them to a cross for all to see... Show them our might makes right, and they may as well succumb to it.
In a testament to humanism of the highest order, Hiroshima today is a thriving city, completely rebuilt and strong in its convictions. It is a city full of people proud to be from Japan. Hiroshima is also the home of many pacifists and forward thinkers. And during the solemn services of remembrance, there was a quiet dignity and pride in the current inhabitants of Japan who stood and said "this is our home, we cannot be be driven from it, even in the face of ultimate horror."
I am glad that there is little ill will between Japan and the US. I am happy that I am able to learn their culture and language. I am glad that I can sit here and type while I drink my umeshu (which I am doing). I am glad I have made friends who brighten my life. And I am glad that I can dream of visiting Japan someday.
And when I do, perhaps I will travel to Hiroshima, and visit the park that stands in honor of the tragedy of August 6th, 1945. I will see the horrible artifacts that remain; I will see the mangled children's tricycle, and the watch that eternally stopped at 8:15 AM. I will see these things, and I will probably cry.
I hope that the USA starts to move away from the muscle approach, and heads in a more humanistic direction. I hope that in the future, we do not see mass slaughter as the only end to conflict. Our current war exposes our own darkness; we hate the terrorists who attack innocent people due to an ideology, only to have come to where are by the same means. The end of God's labors is not to see America proud and strong. America is not the goal of God or evolution. America is just another civilization that hopes it will be the first to last forever.
I hope America changes. I hope that wars become fewer, and I hope that my children can live in a world where Americans are not seen as monsters, and instead appreciated for the diverse and interesting culture we are. I hope that my friendships with Japanese people are not threatened by the image my country gives its citizens. And most of all I hope that we (as a planet) never use nuclear weapons again.
Horns up.
Sunday, August 07, 2005
All your bridesmaids are belong to us.
Topic housekeeping day. Yay!
Well, the great news is that they rescued all seven of the Russian submariners. Can you imagine how horrifying that experience would be? It was cool to see the world unite to help them, and it was a Brittish remote sub that ultimately freed the crew. It would be nice to see the world working together more often than when there is a dire need...
Speaking of multinational coalitions... the space shuttle is coming home. Let's hope they find safety too. On the shuttle is a Japanese astronaut named Soichi Noguchi, who is something of a hero in his native Japan. It was pretty cool the other day when children from Japan transmitted a song to them. They sang "Let's go for a walk!" from the awesome Hayao Miyazaki anime movie My Neighbor Totoro. It was chosen, not only because it is a children's song and a popular character in Japan, but because it was on the day of the space walk (to do repairs). I thought that was very cool.
I went to a wedding yesterday. I have been in, been to, and performed a few weddings in my short life and I can honestly say I do not enjoy them. I don't get a thing out of them. Only a few that I have been to seemed like actual celebrations (my friends Matt and Kristina, Rich and Layla, and Adriane and Jasosn for instance). Yesterday's was nice, and the couple seemed to belong together. The bride was the daughter of my wife's friend from work, which means I sat around not knowing anyone and wondering when we were going to go home. Five hours later I was burnt out and bored.
A few things I observed;
1) When it is time for the toast, the best man always decides its Amatuer Comedy Night. And everyone eggs him on. How many times can you say "I just want to say" before you've wore out your welcome? Brutal.
2) Bridesmaids that wear strapless gowns should be smart enough to tan accordingly. Wow. Bikini top tan lines are a nice addition to any strapless ensemble.
3) If you are the bride's family, and you are paying $12 a plate for a dinner, make sure that it isn't ham sandwiches and plain label potato chips. At least the potato salad was good. I think the mother of the bride was taken, and I feel bad for her.
4) For the love of god, someone has to tell the bride's single friends to stop trying to steal the show.
Okay, well, that was a lame entry. See you all later.
Horns up.
Well, the great news is that they rescued all seven of the Russian submariners. Can you imagine how horrifying that experience would be? It was cool to see the world unite to help them, and it was a Brittish remote sub that ultimately freed the crew. It would be nice to see the world working together more often than when there is a dire need...
Speaking of multinational coalitions... the space shuttle is coming home. Let's hope they find safety too. On the shuttle is a Japanese astronaut named Soichi Noguchi, who is something of a hero in his native Japan. It was pretty cool the other day when children from Japan transmitted a song to them. They sang "Let's go for a walk!" from the awesome Hayao Miyazaki anime movie My Neighbor Totoro. It was chosen, not only because it is a children's song and a popular character in Japan, but because it was on the day of the space walk (to do repairs). I thought that was very cool.
I went to a wedding yesterday. I have been in, been to, and performed a few weddings in my short life and I can honestly say I do not enjoy them. I don't get a thing out of them. Only a few that I have been to seemed like actual celebrations (my friends Matt and Kristina, Rich and Layla, and Adriane and Jasosn for instance). Yesterday's was nice, and the couple seemed to belong together. The bride was the daughter of my wife's friend from work, which means I sat around not knowing anyone and wondering when we were going to go home. Five hours later I was burnt out and bored.
A few things I observed;
1) When it is time for the toast, the best man always decides its Amatuer Comedy Night. And everyone eggs him on. How many times can you say "I just want to say" before you've wore out your welcome? Brutal.
2) Bridesmaids that wear strapless gowns should be smart enough to tan accordingly. Wow. Bikini top tan lines are a nice addition to any strapless ensemble.
3) If you are the bride's family, and you are paying $12 a plate for a dinner, make sure that it isn't ham sandwiches and plain label potato chips. At least the potato salad was good. I think the mother of the bride was taken, and I feel bad for her.
4) For the love of god, someone has to tell the bride's single friends to stop trying to steal the show.
Okay, well, that was a lame entry. See you all later.
Horns up.
Friday, August 05, 2005
Quick note...
Yesterday's post is getting a lot of email, and strangely enough, hardly any comments. I realize it was long, but you have to understand... that is how my mind works. At this rate, the last entry will make my top 5 "greatest hits" that I will be re-publishing at the end of Aug/early Sept. So if you haven't had a chance to read it, please do! And comment!
And because I haven't done it in a while... THE LAST 10 SONGS I HAVE HEARD ON THE CREATIVE NOMAD:
1. If it takes all night - Frank Black
2. L.M.L.Y.P. - Ween
3. Living for the City - Stevie Wonder
4. Baby Phat - De La Soul
5. Swamp - Talking Heads
6. When Problems Arise - Fishbone
7. Buena - Morphine
8. No Exhcange - Minutemen
9. Half Day Closing - Portishead
10. No New Wave No Fun - Mclusky
Read the post directly below this and COMMENT!!!
Horns up.
And because I haven't done it in a while... THE LAST 10 SONGS I HAVE HEARD ON THE CREATIVE NOMAD:
1. If it takes all night - Frank Black
2. L.M.L.Y.P. - Ween
3. Living for the City - Stevie Wonder
4. Baby Phat - De La Soul
5. Swamp - Talking Heads
6. When Problems Arise - Fishbone
7. Buena - Morphine
8. No Exhcange - Minutemen
9. Half Day Closing - Portishead
10. No New Wave No Fun - Mclusky
Read the post directly below this and COMMENT!!!
Horns up.
Thursday, August 04, 2005
"I hope Satan has a nice colon, 'cause that is where you are gonna be living!"
In my 30 years on this Earth, I have been an armchair writer of varying abilities for about 25 years, and a self styled humorist (debatable) for maybe 20. I have only been a Christian (of varying loyalties) for 14. I have only understood what being a Christian means 10 years. I have been a husband for 7 years (as of this Sunday). I have been in ‘real’ love (in varying degrees) with my wife for 4. Coincidentally, I have also only felt truly comfortable in my beliefs and in my ability to explain and defend them for those same 4 years.
And in these 4 years, I have ever so slightly moved further and further away from Conservative Independent Protestant American Christianity. (Should I put the word “White” in there too? Anyway…) And in the last 2 years I have started to realize that I am really ‘sure’ about less and less, and this is inversely proportionate to my soul’s/mind’s/heart’s contentment.
And in the last year, I think I finally figured out why Jesus and I butt heads so often.
Is it His “hard” sayings? Is Christianity too demanding? Is it that theology is so hard to sort out? Is it because Christianity is so contradictory? Is it because I am afraid to be happy? That I am so anti-establishment that I can’t cop to authority? Did public schools let me down? Is it rock and roll? Maybe I am just not predestined to be among “that number?”
Nope.
Jesus’ big brag was that if He was standing amongst the rubble of a former temple, He’d build it up again in 3 days. Me, on the other hand, I am great at tearing things down. Give me a temple and I’ll tear that sucker down in 3 days. I could probably do it in less, but I am pretty lazy.
I look around Council Bluffs and I see that at least I am not alone in this. But let’s talk about me… after all; it’s the most popular subject on this site.
Now watch me work. I can take a decent income and find a way to come up short when I need funds. Who needs to have money for a car repair, oil change, new pair of slacks for work, or a respectable pair of shoes when I could have piles and piles of, well, crap. Speaking of oil changes, I can take a somewhat adequate vehicle and turn it into a rolling trash-bin/death trap. Trust me. That 93 Saturn wasn’t built to last in the first place. Wait ‘til it gets a load of me.
My best trick is to undermine the miracle of Creation / miracle of evolution. (cross out which ever you are too narrow-minded to accept). I can take a naturally healthy body and turn it into a total couch potato. That same body is further torn down by the greasy, salty, and otherwise deadly food that I eat in tremendous proportions. I have choked the Holy of Holies with chicken fries and burrito supremes.
We could draw further evidence for my theory by looking at my slash and burn approach to relationships. I at once yearn for friends and do my best to be unfriendly. I fail to stay in contact, make myself unavailable, and find a way to find the things I hate about a person long before I realize what it is I like about them. I spend a lot of energy on people who fail to reciprocate, and am Scrooge with those who probably deserve attention the most.
Yes sir, I likes to tear me down some temples (grammar incorrect on purpose). But then again, isn’t that what humans do best? What would Jesus do with all of His free time if He wasn’t flying from disaster to disaster rebuilding the shambles of man’s handiwork? I guess I should sleep well at night knowing I am doing my part to keep Jesus needed. Keeping Him off the streets by keeping Him busy, isn’t that how the logic goes? The last thing we want is Jesus sitting on a curb in front of a 7-11, walking around neighborhoods late at night (perhaps pushing Moses into a bush for kicks), driving around with water guns conducting squirt-and-runs, or bumming around the mall. So when you hit your knees tonight, thank God for me: because thanks to me, grace abounds.
What’s so great about temples anyway? I wonder if Jesus is any good at building other things? They tell us He was a carpenter after all. Maybe we could get Him to let a few temples fall from time to time, and instead get to work building something useful like peace. Maybe he could build some bridges (I could use a few). At least He could try to build a house or two, for folks who haven’t a place to live. Or could it be that Jesus is no Ty Pennington? Or do you like “barely a Jimmy Carter” better? Choose your own joke here.
No, we’re talking about Jesus here. The Son of God. Son of Mary, at least. Of course He’s going to be interested in temples first. That’s His bread and butter. That’s where we talk about Him, read His biography, partake in His supper, and take up His offerings. I mean, Barry Bonds isn’t going to testify to congress for stronger steroid penalties (dude, that guy dopes and juices so much his epiglottis has biceps) and lower salaries in sports.
The IRS loves April, fast food chains love the working class, casinos love the elderly, and Jesus loves temples. But then again, I don’t see a lot of good happening within the walls of a temple these days. Most of the temples I see have installed battlements, and have started firing on one another. Now that I think about it, Jesus may just be sub-contracting for Halliburton.
Of course, this is all handy rhetoric for someone who doesn’t want to try to build a temple… let along attempt to slow the tearing down of one. I could turn off the TV, I could exercise more often, I could try to be nicer to people, and I could try eating a salad and fruit now and then. But all of that takes energy, which is so counter to the laws of thermodynamics. Man, just trying to justify my attitude tears down the temple of logic… I guess my theory is holding water pretty well.
So what do I do now that I realize where Jesus and I stand? I mean, the pressure is on me to change right? What will I do now that I know we aren’t exactly dovetailing? I guess we’ll see. A 227 pound, 30 year old man who can barely run a mile without stopping to walk, and who heads immediately to the nearest pop and food stop, only to go home to spend the day watching DVDs and play video games might not be the best person to ask to predict the future.
Of course I will play Bubblegoose meteorologist for a second;
Tomorrow will be partly cloudy with an 80% chance of temple smashing. But hold out for the slight chance of some building. Depends on that high pressure system…
Horn’s up.
PS - Relax, oh Christian friend. Save your hate mail and your disappointment in my character. This is humor, remember. And what do you expect from someone who only blogged seven times or so this summer? Got to work out the rust and cobwebs.
And in these 4 years, I have ever so slightly moved further and further away from Conservative Independent Protestant American Christianity. (Should I put the word “White” in there too? Anyway…) And in the last 2 years I have started to realize that I am really ‘sure’ about less and less, and this is inversely proportionate to my soul’s/mind’s/heart’s contentment.
And in the last year, I think I finally figured out why Jesus and I butt heads so often.
Is it His “hard” sayings? Is Christianity too demanding? Is it that theology is so hard to sort out? Is it because Christianity is so contradictory? Is it because I am afraid to be happy? That I am so anti-establishment that I can’t cop to authority? Did public schools let me down? Is it rock and roll? Maybe I am just not predestined to be among “that number?”
Nope.
Jesus’ big brag was that if He was standing amongst the rubble of a former temple, He’d build it up again in 3 days. Me, on the other hand, I am great at tearing things down. Give me a temple and I’ll tear that sucker down in 3 days. I could probably do it in less, but I am pretty lazy.
I look around Council Bluffs and I see that at least I am not alone in this. But let’s talk about me… after all; it’s the most popular subject on this site.
Now watch me work. I can take a decent income and find a way to come up short when I need funds. Who needs to have money for a car repair, oil change, new pair of slacks for work, or a respectable pair of shoes when I could have piles and piles of, well, crap. Speaking of oil changes, I can take a somewhat adequate vehicle and turn it into a rolling trash-bin/death trap. Trust me. That 93 Saturn wasn’t built to last in the first place. Wait ‘til it gets a load of me.
My best trick is to undermine the miracle of Creation / miracle of evolution. (cross out which ever you are too narrow-minded to accept). I can take a naturally healthy body and turn it into a total couch potato. That same body is further torn down by the greasy, salty, and otherwise deadly food that I eat in tremendous proportions. I have choked the Holy of Holies with chicken fries and burrito supremes.
We could draw further evidence for my theory by looking at my slash and burn approach to relationships. I at once yearn for friends and do my best to be unfriendly. I fail to stay in contact, make myself unavailable, and find a way to find the things I hate about a person long before I realize what it is I like about them. I spend a lot of energy on people who fail to reciprocate, and am Scrooge with those who probably deserve attention the most.
Yes sir, I likes to tear me down some temples (grammar incorrect on purpose). But then again, isn’t that what humans do best? What would Jesus do with all of His free time if He wasn’t flying from disaster to disaster rebuilding the shambles of man’s handiwork? I guess I should sleep well at night knowing I am doing my part to keep Jesus needed. Keeping Him off the streets by keeping Him busy, isn’t that how the logic goes? The last thing we want is Jesus sitting on a curb in front of a 7-11, walking around neighborhoods late at night (perhaps pushing Moses into a bush for kicks), driving around with water guns conducting squirt-and-runs, or bumming around the mall. So when you hit your knees tonight, thank God for me: because thanks to me, grace abounds.
What’s so great about temples anyway? I wonder if Jesus is any good at building other things? They tell us He was a carpenter after all. Maybe we could get Him to let a few temples fall from time to time, and instead get to work building something useful like peace. Maybe he could build some bridges (I could use a few). At least He could try to build a house or two, for folks who haven’t a place to live. Or could it be that Jesus is no Ty Pennington? Or do you like “barely a Jimmy Carter” better? Choose your own joke here.
No, we’re talking about Jesus here. The Son of God. Son of Mary, at least. Of course He’s going to be interested in temples first. That’s His bread and butter. That’s where we talk about Him, read His biography, partake in His supper, and take up His offerings. I mean, Barry Bonds isn’t going to testify to congress for stronger steroid penalties (dude, that guy dopes and juices so much his epiglottis has biceps) and lower salaries in sports.
The IRS loves April, fast food chains love the working class, casinos love the elderly, and Jesus loves temples. But then again, I don’t see a lot of good happening within the walls of a temple these days. Most of the temples I see have installed battlements, and have started firing on one another. Now that I think about it, Jesus may just be sub-contracting for Halliburton.
Of course, this is all handy rhetoric for someone who doesn’t want to try to build a temple… let along attempt to slow the tearing down of one. I could turn off the TV, I could exercise more often, I could try to be nicer to people, and I could try eating a salad and fruit now and then. But all of that takes energy, which is so counter to the laws of thermodynamics. Man, just trying to justify my attitude tears down the temple of logic… I guess my theory is holding water pretty well.
So what do I do now that I realize where Jesus and I stand? I mean, the pressure is on me to change right? What will I do now that I know we aren’t exactly dovetailing? I guess we’ll see. A 227 pound, 30 year old man who can barely run a mile without stopping to walk, and who heads immediately to the nearest pop and food stop, only to go home to spend the day watching DVDs and play video games might not be the best person to ask to predict the future.
Of course I will play Bubblegoose meteorologist for a second;
Tomorrow will be partly cloudy with an 80% chance of temple smashing. But hold out for the slight chance of some building. Depends on that high pressure system…
Horn’s up.
PS - Relax, oh Christian friend. Save your hate mail and your disappointment in my character. This is humor, remember. And what do you expect from someone who only blogged seven times or so this summer? Got to work out the rust and cobwebs.